Oh, okay. The Super Bowl (Superbowl?) is this coming Sunday. The Bengals aren't playing for me to root for, and the Steelers aren't playing for me to root against, so there's just no way I care about this game.
Moving on. (To baseball.)
According to www.cincinnatireds.com, Ol' Junior (oxymoron, eh? eh?) might be moving to right field after having played 18 years (2,113 games!) as a center fielder.
Why? Oh come on. Like you don't know.
...
...
Really? Okay, well first let's take a look at what the right field position is all about. Peter, Paul, and Mary sum it up quite nicely with their tune, "Right Field."
Saturday summers when I was a kid,
We'd run to the school yard and here's what we did,
We'd pick out the captains and we'd choose up the teams,
It was always a measure of my self esteem.
Cause the fastest, the strongest played shortstop and first,
the last ones they picked were the worst.
I never needed to ask, it was sealed,
I just took up my place in right field.
Playing right field, its easy you know,
You can be awkward, you can be slow,
That's why I'm here in right field,
Just watching the dandelions grow.
Playing right field can be lonely and dull,
Little leagues never have lefties that pull,
I dream of the day, when they hit one my way,
They never did, but still I would pray,
That I'd make a fantastic catch on the run,
And not lose the ball in the sun.
And then I'd awake from this long reverie,
And pray that the ball never came out to me.
Here in ...
[solo break]
Off in the distance, the game's dragging on,
There's strikes on the batter, some runners are on,
I don't know the inning, I've forgotten the score.
The whole team is yelling and I don't know what for,
Suddenly everyone's looking at me,
My mind has been wandering, what could it be?
They point to the sky and I look up above,
And the baseball falls into my glove!
Here in right field, Its important you know,
You gotta know how to catch, you gotta know how to throw,
That's why I'm here in right field,
Just watching the dandelions grow.
You might remember this song from that... whatever that commercial was... (Coca-Cola, maybe) that came on before the previews on the VHS for... whatever that movie was... (The Land Before Time, perhaps). Anyway, good song, okay commercial, and brilliant movie (whatever it was). But more importantly, you get what right field really is.
So why are we putting Griffey where the dandelions grow? Because he hasn't played in 145 games since moving to Cincinnati in 2000. The guy's getting old. He's almost
40! Last year alone he strained a bicep tendon in his right knee, putting him on the disabled list for a month, this after having had dislocated his right toe earlier in the season. Even when he's off the field he be gettin' injured like an old fool. This holiday season he broke his left hand while at home. He's recovering well, but still. We gotta protect his ass and get him out of the center of the field.
Now I know scooting him over to the right will be awkward and sad. Kind of like watching a war veteran get senile (even if it was just the agent orange). But he'll make up for it at the plate; don't worry.
If there's any sport that's about breaking tradition, it's baseball.
